Letter to my younger self.

Now that no one bothers with blogging I think this would be a good time for me to reflect on life in general. Browsing through some of my older posts really got me thinking about how much things have changed since my last post. Man I really do cringe whenever I read some of those lame posts that I made public for the whole world to see. But at the same time there is this side of me that refuses to delete or alter the posts. I reckon it's cause deep down inside without a doubt that that was the past and nothing you can do could change the things that you've done and the experiences that your actions have created for the people around you. In this case those people would be someone like you :) my dear reader Hello there and thank you so much for stumbling upon my crappy blog. You may have been doing what I had just been doing a few minutes ago. Looking through some older posts by your friends or perhaps if you were as narcissistic as I am you would have been looking at your own posts thinking why couldn't I have been cooler. Not sure how long will it be till this post would be read by another person other than myself. Maybe clem from the future is reading this. Perhaps some 4-5 years from now :) your alive be happy and thankful. If you are a reader other than clem do leave me a smiley or just a random hey just so I can this post won't simply be me talking to myself :p Anyways the objective of today's blogging activity is a reflection or a letter to my fat hypocritical shy bad tempered 15 year old teenage self. Whaddup kid. It's clem from the future telling you that things are not as disastrous as they could be. In other words your greatest dreams are yet to be fulfilled but nevertheless know that things are still awesome because the people you care for the most (depending on the mood your in this would typically be individuals like your folks and siblings) are healthy , safe and happy. Great news your parents have just recently sold the shop in fern tree fully :o :) :D . Yea my thoughts exactly. I guys you were right and I reckon even dad would acknowledge that a certain extent you may have been just the tiniest puniest bit correct in your notion that leaving Heidelberg was a god awful idea and the new shop won't be successful.but your parents are free now in 2014 :) god has provided. Oh btw you came bac to church and your now officially a bible thumping youth leader who gets less than 2 hours of sleep on weekends cos your practising for worship. Instead of being a stinge and hiding your money in your drawers you are now a foolish stinge who gives weekly to the church building fund declaring God I'm poor but that's ok cos food and money pops out here and there :) Just kidding you do enjoy being in church and meeting some amazing people in your life. So you'll probably be wondering at this stage what does your teenage years have installed for you. Perhaps even what will I be studying in uni and stuff. I'll answer the uni but cos it's quite and interesting story you go through. Brace yourself. So if My memory serves me right you were thinking of becoming a lawyer. Congrats you did make it into law school at Monash University. You wasted your year 12years banging into them books. Ye sure you did get some accolades and some money from scholarships too but guess what that wasn't enough for you :p. You actually quit law/biomed school ye you did a double degree to chase after a silly little dream of becoming yes the clichés of all asian cliches a Docta. As of 2014 you chucked away a massive 35k law scholarship yes 35k coughs* idiot to go study radiotherapy cos you think this is a better way to get into graduate medicine. Perhaps it'll be a good idea to change career plans and stick to journalism you'd be happier I reckon ;) Anyways teenage years. Your gonna make many different friendship groups some you think wow they are awesome and we will be besties for life but then you think man all these people do is drink and blergh and drink and blergh some more. But you still see them when you feel like doing the odd blergh yourself. But there are still those friends you known all along perhaps even one of two acquaintances your not really close too but end up being super close to

hey hey you this is my blog :P plus new song

love it? hate it? tell me

Who Am I?

I think its only about time for me to talk a bit about this family of mine. But I ain't just gonna talk about my family, I'm gonna talk about where they came
from. You see my family tree is really really confusing so I probably would forget about sooner or later. So I thought, why not detail it in my blog while I still remember.
Choo family.
The very complex Choo family originated from Fujian a province on the southeast coast of China. According to the ever reliable wikipedia, Hakka people from the province were usually from the southwestern area. So my ancestors would probably have came from Longyan city. Anyways according to my uncles and Dad my great-great-grandparents and his son my great grandfather came over to Kuala Lumper, Malaysia leaving some their family. Up until my Dad's generation most of the members in the Choo family followed the family tradition of working as funeral planners or ritual leaders. Basically their job was to ensure the dead were sent or accepted into hell as their job also included chants and other rituals in funerals. The reason they came over to Malaysia was never clearly explained but according to some of the elder members of the Choo family, they were hired to plan and perform the rites for Yap Ah Loy who died in 1885. If this was true that would be the year of their arrival. My great grandfather had two children one of them, my grandfather Choo Ah Yit.He married Chin Moon after several failed marriages. The first of his was an arranged one when he was a child which never came to be as she passed away at a very young age. Never the less she was still honored as part of the family. My grandad later met another girl who left him with their only daughter to Singapore. He followed the family tradition and lived in Chinatown. The place they lived on top of a shop in a house with two rooms and they didn't have much. The place is located near a car park in Chinatown leading to a food court which I can't specifically describe its whereabouts.My Dad recalled growing up having a night time supper of left over rice and for some reason serving it with water. He also enjoyed rice dumplings which his grandmother would bring over and hang on the door of his room. My dad claimed that he would eat for the three meals of a day in his room. As a teenager he spent most of his time helping out his dad with the family tradition. His dad was a very strict which I believe was due to their living conditions and the need of supporting his family of ten children which included eight boys and two girls. My dad was the eldest son and the second oldest in his family. An interesting fact of my family is that my grandmother was of Javanese ethnicity as one of her ancestors claimed he was one. So for now it makes me a Hakka Chinese Malaysian with a dash of Javanese. My grand father passed away in 1969 at the age of 40. This left my dad with the responsibility;ity of taking care of the family. My dad once told me to strengthen my relationship with my siblings as he told me that his relationship with his siblings wasn't as strong. In the Choo family we gather during weddings, funerals or other significant events. But life resumes as usual on other days. Two of my Dad's brothers have not been seen. One of them as a result of his strained relationship with his family. The other one, well his just missing for some reason leaving his children in the care of their mother.Two of my uncles took on the family tradition with one of them. One of them is still active with his profession. My Dad worked hard with his studies and job after his dad's death and succeeded but life with it's ups and downs so you can never tell. Another one of my uncle is working as a tourist guide in Thailand. My two aunties are now semi retired after years of working as noodle suppliers. The remaining two of my uncles live together as they both took on jobs. My mum claims that I could very well have a 100 relatives as many of my uncles had children and most of their children had children of their own. It's a very complex family.My Dad told me about his dad keeping in contact with some of the descendants of his family in China. But after a few years of no contact he hasn't heard from then.

Tan Family.
The Tan family lived closely with each other and through the years they had been together as the family grew. It all started when my grandfather young orphaned child from Hainan Island was separated from his brother his only known family to be brought to Malaysia as a peasant. He held different jobs which included selling ice-cream and working in a rubber estate. During the war he married my grandmother Foo Ying. She was born in 1928 and recalled running and hiding as a teenager when the siren would ring as the Japanese troops attacked. It is claimed that her father was an engineer and she lived in a rather privileged environment before the war began. Not long after their marriage she gave birth to a daughter. After a miscarriage and the death of their young son they moved to Kuala Lumpur shortly after the birth of another daughter. My grandmother worked as a servant in a British family. She had six children which included 5 daughters and a son. They lived in a nine leveled apartment building next to Victoria Institution which they claimed was a great school for the smartest (personally I think Victoria is crap after half a year of tolerating the school as I was made to study in there). According to my grandmother my grandpa volunteered to join the Communist group of the time but decided to abandon the decision. Years passed as their children had children of their own. It was in 1986 that my Dad after the success of his job working as a supplier of TVB videos that he met my mum in a nightclub or a bar. They got along well enough that they were engaged in 1987. After spending a few weeks in Hong Kong with my mum and her family they got married in the 31st of August. Four years later they had a child. Three years later they had a better one! And seven years later they had a pretty average one. So who am I ? I'm a Chinese Hakka Malaysian with a tiny tiny bit of Javanese as they claim and a twist of Hainanese.

I Miss Camp

This is my new song. Its called Rain Fall On Me. The words may be very deep to understand. But you would have to be standing from my point of view to see it.. To make it easier for you...the shine from the sun would always be wanted. So in this song the shine would mean love while the rain would mean loneliness.......that's the key of the song. Shine means love ....Rain means loneliness or the power of singleness...the moral of the story is whatever troubles you feel seeing all them love birds around you...don't feel bad....there are many people going through this along with you....embrace the rain rather than running away from it....embrace loneliness as a gift rather than a curse....

Lyrics:
I was once afraid when clouds were high
It glooms up and it takes my bright blue sky
I was always the one to run and hide
But now it seems my sun shines inside

Cause you've been holding me back and been putting me down
Been making me sick when you come around
But rain rain come and fall on me
Chorus
Rain Rain Come And Fall On Me
Cos now you only wash away me tears
You cool me down and you freeze my fears
So Rain Rain Come and fall on me

Love means shine and rain keeps it unshown
But girls of shine leave rainy guys alone
And when the sun it never comes to shine
Those lonely hearts will have a rainy time
See I was always seeking for sun shine
I tried so hard but she wouldn't be mine
So though it rains but I'm still feeling fine

Days have pass since the sun shined on me
But hey life's good and its still to be
And for the ones who's feeling way too cold
I feel your pain but its time to let her go
Does that shine really mean so much for you?
Just live without her and stop being a fool
And let the rain rain let it fall on you

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Forest Edge Camp 1st-5th of June
As part of my Year 9 New Horizon Program, some of the year 9 students including me myself went on a camp at Forest Edge down in Neerim. The camp was one of the best camp I have been to with excellent activities , lots of free time and great teachers and attendees. It was awesome!

Day 1
After waiting for months, the day finally came.Woke up at 7.30 in the morning and took a nice hot shower. Had some chocolate milk and watched the telly as my mum came out. It was the morning news show and it reported that one of the last survivors of the Titanic (big boat that went bye bye with that good movie based on it) passed away. It was really sad but my mind was too busy with thoughts and it was still blurry as I woke up not long ago. At 8.15 I decided to go and grabbed my stuff which included a trolley bag and a backpack. The trolley bag was used to keep my clothing and important stuff like me sleeping bag and toiletries while the back pack was used for chips,soft drinks and wants instead of needs. So I walked into my brothers room and smacked him and said goodbye and walked out with my mum watching by the door. Said a loud and cheerful "Bye Bye!" and walked down to my school which was a 5 minute walk downhill. Got to school and looked for familiar faces. Sat around some fellow campers waiting for some of my buddies. After 20 minutes I saw Philong and Thong two of my Vietnamese soccer mates and waited for Anthony together while chatting around. Everyone were in great spirits and not long later Anthony came with his mum. I greeted the both of them and after his mum went off , I immediately took my Serious Man look off and started mucking around. At around 9.00 the teachers grouped us and marked the attendance. It was sad as one of the boys who dint hand in the permission slip was asked to go home. We got one the bus and started the journey. Sat next to Anthony on the window seat. And hour and ten minutes passed as I stared out of the window falling asleep and waking up. Not long later we were out of Melbourne and entered Neerim. It was a mountainous area with lots of trees and farm animals with stacks of hay. When we got there we unloaded the bus and got into a function room. The first thing me and the soccer mates notice was the huge soccer field. Had a briefing. We were then assigned our rooms. My room was cabin 24 which was interconnected with 23 by the toilet which both cabins must share. My room mates were Dian,Philong , Anthony in cabin 24 while Kingo, Yukitzuru (both japanese students) , Boscow and Thong in the other. We got on well instantly joking around with Japanese words. We had a short time to get use to the rooms but me ,Anthony and Philong spent it playing soccer in the magnificent football pitch. It had a perfect 8 feet tall goalpost and the pitch was great with awesome fresh air around us and England like weather. So I called the pitch Old Trafford. We were separated into our day group activities and my groups first activity was mini golf and trampoline. Me, Ucien and Juan Carlos played against each other. After playing 12-13 holes the teachers told us it was time for trampoline activity. We couldn't be bothered but went along to watch them play on the tramps. It wasn't really interesting so the teachers offered us to grab the golf sticks to continue our tournament. In the end I won narrowly, and we were told to get up to the meeting deck for afternoon tea. I decided to change into my shorts and asked Anthony to come along for a jog around the soccer pitch. In the end I did 9 laps around the huge full size soccer pitch gasping for fresh air when I stopped. Then we took some free kicks which had excellent result with the awesome non-bumpy pitch. The Siren went signalling us to go up the deck for activity two. My group had indoor hockey. It was brilliant and I was sweating and all wet. After hockey we had the BIG FREE TIME from 4-15 till 5.30. We spent it wisely on soccer :). Had dinner and on that night pasta was served. It wasn't the most Italiano Mambo Amore pasta I had but it was ok. Mums spaghetti is the BEST!!So no pasta can beat my mum's . Cos hers is the best. After diner we were told to form our night time activity group. In it my group had Stephen, Cameron (John ), Anton, Phil, Thong, Andrew , Uchien, Juan, and Mick. For our first activity group 4,5,6 were seperated into two to play Catch-The-Flag. It was awesome we played it in complete darkness on Forest Edge's foggy night time. It was so dark and we played it like we were in the army. I was constantly shouting. Our tactic was for the girls to stay at the hidden base down at the volleyball area which was so far and hidden while boys attack together and gang on isolated opponents. After crawling for a while staying hidden I decided to change plans and ordered my mates to attack together instead of sneaking. So we shouted like hooligans attacking the helpless girls cornering them. It was like three against one. Each on one side. It was awesome. We even managed to gang on bigger guys who were huge but easy prey when left alone. My favorite was teaming up in gangs of five on the smaller opponents mainly girls. It was really fun and we were leading by 20 points. In the end we won. Despite no teams finding the flag. We just snatched them from opponents we attacked and won. We had a second round which was even better when all of the lights were closed and we some girls form our side decided to join in on the attacking spree. I remembered shouting at alone targets who would usually run in fear. But there were also some tough ones who may choose to run or fight back. Usually for those we we would corner down or outrun them. So we won! Oh and Philong accidentally attacked our own girls (or was it on purpose? ;).Had a light supper which consisted a cup of coco and cake. Went back and had a shower. Many of us didn't sleep early . MOst of us just kept chatting. But as the night got old we knew that we had to sleep. But none of us managed to get goood sleep cos Philong was snoring very very loudly. I was waken up twice. Once at 3.30 and 5.15 not long later.
Day 2
A teacher came in and woke us up at 6.30 in the morning. Placed my jumper on and walked to the deck. We had to jog up the hill. I finished 5th out of 30 students. at 3 minutes and 25 seconds. Not bad considering the incline. After that we had some free time before breakfast. So Philong and I played some street soccer on the deck of our cabin. Anthony came out and I decided to go for my jog and did six laps. Breakfast was served and I had two pieces of toast served with butter. Philong got me a cup of coffee from a Nescafe machine. So then we wen't back for a short free time before our first activity. As usual soccer was first choice at the field we consider the equivalent to Old Trafford. The first activity of the day was high ropes. It was one of the most challenging activity. We grouped under the high ropes course. It was roughly 6 storeys up at the peak. I did the hanging tyres. When I got up there. It was probably two storeys up in the air. Looking down was really scary and the tyres were swinging in each step I took with the empty middle part the tyre showing the people looking up from below. I got down save. So then we had morning tea which was just some cordial drink and I had some oranges. Then we did archery which was fun. For lunch we had some pasta with ham and sauce. Didn't had much during the camp which was possibly why everyone thought I lost weight coming back from camp. So after lunch we had the usual break and after that we went hut building as our third activity of the day. We were told the build huts that would shelter our group. So me, Juan Carlos and Uchian worked together to build the hut. We leaned fallen braches on trees to form the hut and used leaves and dried plants to make the roofs. It was perfect and our team got a 7/10 which was good. Afternoon tea came after that. We went down the field to play and this time I worked on my free kicks improving my swerves. Our last day time activity was camp cooking. While the ladies made the bread to cook. Us guys build the fire. Credits on making the fire with our first match stick to Brad and James. But the dough for the bread was not good enough so in the end we had fire but no bread. Mr Pierson told us the story of Jasen Morgeroit a man who died around the place after years of unreasonable bad experiences caused by society. We then had the long free time.AFter the free time we had dinner. That night we had the best meal of the camp. We were served fish und chipse. It was vier gut. I had it along with Tartar sauce. After dinner we were sen't to our rooms to get ready. Our night group was going for a bush walk. We started the bush walk at night and were told not to switch our torches on as the purpose of the walk is to help us get use to walking in the dark in a way developing skills. The walk was hard. It was slippery. Lauren fell down and I managed to help her get up and nearly fell myself. Mick and Philong was in front of me. All I did was grabbed Mick's jumper because it was really dark. The bush walk stopped when we reached Morgeroit's Hut. It was build for Jasen Morgeroit whom after years of hardship was finally realesed from Beachworth Asylum.He decided to go back to Forest Edge to spend the rest of his life as his family abandoned him. In the end Jasen was believed to have died from a heart attack alone in the hut. Legend has it that some of the staff would see him outside their windows....Scary....SO at the hut many people were scared. Mick was so scared that I had to calm him down. I offered him to stand near the crowd while I stood outside of it. He was trembling. So I said that there was nothing and only his imagination was causing the fear. Kingo said he saw a ghost after he switched his torch on. He reckons it was sitting behind the hut. Mr Graham tried to calm us down by saying " This is the forest of Australia....The only thing that could harm you here is your imagination" Strong words indeed. Many people were scared as Mr Graham told us the story of Jasen Morgeroit and described him as a normal person just like you and me. This made things easier for many people. After coming back we enjoyed some nice Cocoa and went to bed. That night I slept like a baby after taking a Panamax and some Flu tablets. Zzzzzzz
Day 3
We got up 6.45 and I did the run at 3 minute and 10 seconds. A new record! for me. Wen't back and did my jog of six laps. Had breakfast. That morning I made the worst cup of tea ever. NEVER ADD CREAM TO LEMON TEA OR BETTER YET NEVER DRINK LEMON TEA UNLESS ITS COLD FROM A NESTLE BOTTLE. So my groups first morning activity was Doomball.It was fun despite my team losing it was an awesome activity. So then we had morning tea and some free time. We spent it playing hackey sack with Mr Graham. It was really fun and the person who said "sorry" had the sack thrown at him. This led to a new game in which a person who said "mine" had to do ten push ups. After that we had rock wall.I managed to finish the first wall. Climbed up to the top and touch the pole. But the second one was way too hard. Lunch came and that afternoon at 12.15 we had Hotdogs. I added some barbeque sauce on mine. Had it with egg and pasta salad too. Then us boys started the first of many Ping Pong doubles. Thong was with me against Anton and Philong. Our third activity was the Initiatives. We did a range of activity which circled around team work including the blind folded walk. Continued on table tennis during the afternoon tea. Then my group had meditation. It was really funny. All we did was slept on the floor listening to some guy telling us to imagine stuff like flying to an enchanted land where you can eat fruits from trees grown by black and white marbles and the rest of it was listening to rain and church bells. All of us fell asleep. When we woke up it was free time. I continued on our Table tennis game with Juan Carlos on my side. We had dinner and for that night we were served rice with cream chicken. Thje chicken was awesome but the rice....the rice was unique. After dinner we were told to form groups with girls and in the end I ended up with Andrew and a girl named Monica with her friends. It was a trivia game and my team did ok. Wen't to sleep after supper.
Day 4

The

Rise and Fall Of The Blogs.

A Long time go a man with his stories lead to the inspiration of his peers and his student.Before too long his stories were hailed to its best glory. People stood and stare everywhere as the stories told grew old. His student caught on to his teachings and created his story to tell. Candle and A Lighter was his first and little did it do well. Perhaps a story of a game that never ends. His stories read but his presence too far to understand. People everywhere gathered round with daily tales to spread around. One by one they share their lives with pride. Happiness,sadness, and parts of their live.With their stories they share with care. A great man stood with challenges to him, years his troubles to stay within. A joyful boy fueled by sorrow turned his stories away. Never to return a single word to the people who wishes a word from him to say. And in the end the creator stands alone to himself. The student to far to be heard by anyone else. The great man rejoices with the holy ghost. The boy who left a legacy for the people he was once able to see. People too busy to share....their stories ending nowhere.
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I use to wake up everyday....to see what people have to say.
If you hear me....

Young Boy's Love Song

Young Boy's Love Song
Lyrics:
One of these days you will see
The love that you had for him was never meant to be
Don't fall on back to fantasy
Come back to me in reality

I never ever let you down sitting on your own
I never ever put you away to cry all alone
I always stood by your side
In times of sadness, a place to hide

Whatever happened to the times we shared
The times when our eyes met
All the times that you stood beside me
Our love shown silently
I allowed him to hold you close
Cause for you he meant the most

Bridge
Riches may he show,
Beauties all he knows

One of these days you will see
The love that you had for him was never meant to be
Don't fall on back to fantasy
Come back to me in reality

His been playing you like his fool, his charms all a lie
While you've been crying everyday and night waiting for his reply
All the tears that you cried for him
Forgetting your past in a life of sin

Give him all your best as you can as though he understands




With all his love for somebody else and to you he pretends
That love was all the pleasure that you bring
Just because he promised you a ring.

Bridge
Riches may he show
Beauties all he knows

One of these days you will see
The love that you had for him was never meant to be
Don't fall on back to fantasy
Come back to me in reality

A day will come when you realize that love was more to see
And you'll unchain the bird of your life, and that young girl shall be free
And that young girl shall be free
And that young girl shall be free
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